Potato

The worst part about growing up, the absolute worst part is that you no longer lose any teeth.
Come on! That was fun, it was fun to have a wiggly tooth. I enjoyed it.
And then you got cash for it, what kind of a messed up awesome system is that? You get paid for pieces of your body falling off. How cool was that? It was very cool.
But now, no loose teeth. No grossing everyone out by bending your tooth over and showing your empty gum. If I had known at the time I lost my last tooth, that it was my last tooth I would loose, I would have savored the experienced. I would have grossed out as many people as I could in that precious time remaining. But no, I made no big deal of it. I didn't know it was the last one. Man I tell ya, there are few things I regret about my childhood, and not appreciating my loose teeth to their maximum potential is one of them. But then again, what child fully capitalizes on that? Not me, apparently.
Also, if adults could still lose teeth I think the world would be a better place. We wouldn't be in a recession if a magical fairy placed cash under our pillows every time we loose a tooth. There would be all around cuter looking faces. Come on, who doesn't love a toothy grin? Maybe not on a 30 year old, but we don't know for sure. Maybe it's sexy. The point is that we don't know and won't know what life would be like if we continued losing teeth and regrowing new ones past childhood, we could have a better America, but no. Some "higher power" up there decided we should suffer and let all the young naive children have all the fun and money. Thanks for nothing, Mother Nature.

Shmeh.

Ya know what I flippin dislike?
Owl City.
Frickin hate them/him/it.
And I hate it even more when I'm talking about "it" to some smartass who has to correct me every time I say "them". Excuse me for forgetting it's just one lame dude who decided he wanted to fool the world into thinking he had a band. Newsflash: HE'S AN IDIOT. How can you even listen to him? It's like the soundtrack to an estrogen filled robot orgy. Disgusting. Disgusting indeed.
Really, a million fireflies? Yeah, tell me about that. Vanilla Twilight, way to capitalize on the Twilight fad. Congratulations, all the hyper-obsessed teenage girls love you, as well as the partially deaf. Also, do you really need to greet an entire city in a song. Really? A simple "Hey" would do. But nooo. You had to go and produce an entire crappy CD filled with that vile filth. Good job, you can work a synthesizer, go back to the 80's. I wouldn't mind this so much if he (THEY) weren't constantly being played on the radio/sung by more people who can't sing. It's ridiculous, the fame you get for having absolutely no talent. It makes me sick, yet at the same time gives me hope. Regardless, Owl City sucks and needs to be flattened by a bulldozer.

You know what I do enjoy?
Being a detective. That's right. I'm certified. If certified means unlicensed...
But, hey, it's a step. A step towards victory, ain't that right Ms. Piggy?
If she was here she would have agreed with me. It's just a shame that she isn't. I miss her spunk.

Schnikeyz I'm tired. I will fall asleep fast tonight, it must be that bear tranquilizer shot at me earlier today. Man those things are strong. I best be hibernating now then. Goodnight non existent fan base. I do love you.